Rock – It’s Your Decision

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Funda-mentalist Christians have long had a problem with rock music. It is, after all, The Devil’s Music, and encourages rebellion, individuality, sexual experimentation, homosexuality and drug use – not to mention all the backward masked Satanic messages and such. There are extraordinary, sprawling documentaries explaining why that catchy rock tune by AC/DC or… erm… John Denver is actually a message directly from Satan telling you to inject marijuana while masturbating furiously and disrespecting your parents. If you have four hours to spare, we suggest you seek out and watch the hilarious documentary series Hell’s Bells for some first-rate insanity from a mulleted pastor who initially seems cool but is soon condemning you to Hell for listening to Fleetwood Mac.

The message is also rammed home in the fictional film Rock – It’s Your Decision, in which rock fan Jeff struggles to balance his love of the evil rock ‘n’ roll with his evangelical beliefs. Funnily enough, it would seem to be the latter that sees him ostracised from society – the Devil works in mysterious ways, eh? Will Jeff see the light and burn his collection of soft rock, or will he be damned for eternity because of his love for Jefferson Starship and Barry Manilow? What do you think?

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Made in 1982, the film is jaw-droppingly awful, not just in production values and message, but in the way it misinterprets song lyrics and sweeps every sort of popular music under the ‘evil rock’ banner, while trotting out homophobic hysteria and lunatic ideas about the evils of simply enjoying music.

Of course, there may be some subversion at play here – Jeff , when undergoing his Christian conversion, becomes such a self-important prig that the image we come away with of Christians is not a complementary one. But that’s probably giving the film too much credit.

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